An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cursed her.
Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a
line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum
thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad....I became a prostitute...."
"Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
"OK, dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur
coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a savings certificate for
£5 million."
"For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye daddy, the sparkling
new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a
membership to the country club....(takes a breath)....and an invitation
for ye all to spend New Years' Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera,
and...."
Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a prostitute dad! Sniff, sniff.
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old man a hug!"
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Two Irish couples decide to spice up their sex lives by swapping partners.
Afterwards, Paddy says, "That was fucking great! I wonder how the girls got on."
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